Wraith of Love
Chapter One - The End - cont'd
“James?”
She knew that was her name. She didn’t want to open her eyes. Maybe they’d go away.
“Jameson?”
Stop saying that, she wanted to cry, but the tube in her throat wouldn’t let her.
“James, sweetie, say something.”
She knew that voice. Don’t think of the name because then you won’t be able to let it go. Too late. Serena. It was Serena.
“I don’t know what to tell you. She shouldn’t be doing this.” Don’t know that voice, she thought.
“It’s a miracle.” Serena.
“Well, I don’t know about that…” Must be a doctor. That must mean I’m in a hospital. Shit. It didn’t work.
Against her better wishes, James struggled to open her eyes. She wanted them to look at her and into her eyes and know that she didn’t want to be here.
But as her lids lifted, the first thing she saw was Serena. Her solid, unflappable best friend who had seen her through the rough times and the wonderful times. And Serena was crying, tears pouring down her cheeks. Her eyes filled with love and hope and pain and so many things James couldn’t read. Serena gasped as she realized that James had opened her eyes.
“James?”
James wanted suddenly to smile but the muscles in her face wouldn’t work.
“James?” The other voice was on the other side of the bed. With a huge effort, she turned her gaze that way and met the flecked green eyes of her other best friend, Guy. A man always filled with joy who had given her such pleasure and taken care of her along with Serena now gazed down at her with such pain and such loss in his eyes that it broke her heart.
She found the strength to stretch her fingers out and touch Guy’s hand. Without any thought, Guy intertwined his fingers with hers, then realized what that meant.
“James?” Guy whispered, afraid to believe it.
James still couldn’t find her voice but tightened her fingers around his. Her smiles wouldn’t work so she willed her eyes to say everything. Then she saw it. The joy returned to his sea foam green eyes.
“Welcome back.”
**********************
“Your recovery has been… well… astounding.”
James sat on the edge of the hospital bed, dressed in clean clothes provided by Serena, twitching and tapping her feet. She was ready to go home. Two days under observation was two days too many. The doctors kept flashing lights in her eyes, drawing more blood, sending her for numerous tests over and over again, then standing and shaking their heads over the results. She wanted to just get the hell out and go home.
“I mean, you came in with your major organs virtually shut down. You were clinically dead. You shouldn’t have recovered so quickly.”
“Nice bedside manner, doc.”
“Sorry. I’ve just never seen anybody recover like this after such…”
Serena and Guy saved James from more doctoring by appearing in the doorway.
“She ready to go home, doc?” Guy asked, coming over to sit next to James on the bed. The doctor looked over her chart again, then finally tossed it on the bed.
“Absolutely. Just make sure you come in if you have any effects…”
“I know, dizziness, nausea, yada, yada, yada. Let’s blow this joint.”
Just then, a nurse came into the room and took the chart from the doctor.
“Glad you’re still here, Ms. Mercer. I just need to do one last check of your vitals for your chart.” She reached her hand out and touched her fingers to James’ wrist.
Immediately, James knew that the woman’s boyfriend was cheating on her and that the woman knew this and that the woman knew that her boyfriend knew. James could see their life in front of her eyes, the lies, the silences, the tension. Stunned, the loneliness and aching and torture of the situation filled James. She took the woman’s hand and looked deep into her eyes.
“You need to go. You have to go.” The nurse looked at James, somehow understanding what she was talking about. The others in the room didn’t seem to notice the exchange.
“I know,” the nurse said, “but it’s just…”
James took her hand again. “You have to go now. It’s not going to get better.”
James could see how much of an understatement that was. Her “visions” or whatever had also shown her a glimpse of the nurse, battered and bleeding, and the other woman standing over her. “Pack tonight. There’s not much time.”
The nurse made a note in the chart, eyes James warily, then left. As soon as she was gone, James felt the pain and hopelessness leave her, giving her an infusion of energy.
James leapt off the bed, feeling stronger than she remembered feeling in years. She was only 32 but some days felt like she was 50. Today, she felt more than 16. She grabbed her purse and was out the door before the doctor could finish his sentence about her needing a wheelchair to be discharged. Guy and Serena joyfully scampered after her.
James pounded on the elevator button, anxious to get outside and breathe, to get away from this place, to try to figure out her life.
She felt a presence behind her and turned. The same man who had whispered to her while she was dying was standing there. He smiled enigmatically and she couldn’t help herself – she returned the smile.
“You are looking much better.”
“Thank you.” She knew immediately that it was the voice that she had heard while she was in the dark place. It was his voice that had brought her back.
“You have been given a blessing and a curse.” She realized that he wasn’t speaking English but she didn’t know what language he was speaking. She wasn’t surprised that she understood him, though.
“You will avenge your wounds, your pain. You will share this with others. It is your blessing and your curse.”
“I don’t want it.”
“There is no choice.”
“There’s always choice.”
“You will return to that place, that peace, when true love returns to you.”
He took her face gently in his hands, kissing her chastely on the cheek. His gnarled hands closed over hers and he walked away. James looked into her fist. He had placed an amulet there, shaped vaguely like a heart, with a “W” embedded in its center.
Guy and Serena finally caught up with her.
“James, you really should have waited for…” Serena followed James’ gaze but didn’t see the stranger disappear around the corner. “You okay?”
James pounded on the elevator button again. “Get me the fuck out of here.”
She knew that was her name. She didn’t want to open her eyes. Maybe they’d go away.
“Jameson?”
Stop saying that, she wanted to cry, but the tube in her throat wouldn’t let her.
“James, sweetie, say something.”
She knew that voice. Don’t think of the name because then you won’t be able to let it go. Too late. Serena. It was Serena.
“I don’t know what to tell you. She shouldn’t be doing this.” Don’t know that voice, she thought.
“It’s a miracle.” Serena.
“Well, I don’t know about that…” Must be a doctor. That must mean I’m in a hospital. Shit. It didn’t work.
Against her better wishes, James struggled to open her eyes. She wanted them to look at her and into her eyes and know that she didn’t want to be here.
But as her lids lifted, the first thing she saw was Serena. Her solid, unflappable best friend who had seen her through the rough times and the wonderful times. And Serena was crying, tears pouring down her cheeks. Her eyes filled with love and hope and pain and so many things James couldn’t read. Serena gasped as she realized that James had opened her eyes.
“James?”
James wanted suddenly to smile but the muscles in her face wouldn’t work.
“James?” The other voice was on the other side of the bed. With a huge effort, she turned her gaze that way and met the flecked green eyes of her other best friend, Guy. A man always filled with joy who had given her such pleasure and taken care of her along with Serena now gazed down at her with such pain and such loss in his eyes that it broke her heart.
She found the strength to stretch her fingers out and touch Guy’s hand. Without any thought, Guy intertwined his fingers with hers, then realized what that meant.
“James?” Guy whispered, afraid to believe it.
James still couldn’t find her voice but tightened her fingers around his. Her smiles wouldn’t work so she willed her eyes to say everything. Then she saw it. The joy returned to his sea foam green eyes.
“Welcome back.”
**********************
“Your recovery has been… well… astounding.”
James sat on the edge of the hospital bed, dressed in clean clothes provided by Serena, twitching and tapping her feet. She was ready to go home. Two days under observation was two days too many. The doctors kept flashing lights in her eyes, drawing more blood, sending her for numerous tests over and over again, then standing and shaking their heads over the results. She wanted to just get the hell out and go home.
“I mean, you came in with your major organs virtually shut down. You were clinically dead. You shouldn’t have recovered so quickly.”
“Nice bedside manner, doc.”
“Sorry. I’ve just never seen anybody recover like this after such…”
Serena and Guy saved James from more doctoring by appearing in the doorway.
“She ready to go home, doc?” Guy asked, coming over to sit next to James on the bed. The doctor looked over her chart again, then finally tossed it on the bed.
“Absolutely. Just make sure you come in if you have any effects…”
“I know, dizziness, nausea, yada, yada, yada. Let’s blow this joint.”
Just then, a nurse came into the room and took the chart from the doctor.
“Glad you’re still here, Ms. Mercer. I just need to do one last check of your vitals for your chart.” She reached her hand out and touched her fingers to James’ wrist.
Immediately, James knew that the woman’s boyfriend was cheating on her and that the woman knew this and that the woman knew that her boyfriend knew. James could see their life in front of her eyes, the lies, the silences, the tension. Stunned, the loneliness and aching and torture of the situation filled James. She took the woman’s hand and looked deep into her eyes.
“You need to go. You have to go.” The nurse looked at James, somehow understanding what she was talking about. The others in the room didn’t seem to notice the exchange.
“I know,” the nurse said, “but it’s just…”
James took her hand again. “You have to go now. It’s not going to get better.”
James could see how much of an understatement that was. Her “visions” or whatever had also shown her a glimpse of the nurse, battered and bleeding, and the other woman standing over her. “Pack tonight. There’s not much time.”
The nurse made a note in the chart, eyes James warily, then left. As soon as she was gone, James felt the pain and hopelessness leave her, giving her an infusion of energy.
James leapt off the bed, feeling stronger than she remembered feeling in years. She was only 32 but some days felt like she was 50. Today, she felt more than 16. She grabbed her purse and was out the door before the doctor could finish his sentence about her needing a wheelchair to be discharged. Guy and Serena joyfully scampered after her.
James pounded on the elevator button, anxious to get outside and breathe, to get away from this place, to try to figure out her life.
She felt a presence behind her and turned. The same man who had whispered to her while she was dying was standing there. He smiled enigmatically and she couldn’t help herself – she returned the smile.
“You are looking much better.”
“Thank you.” She knew immediately that it was the voice that she had heard while she was in the dark place. It was his voice that had brought her back.
“You have been given a blessing and a curse.” She realized that he wasn’t speaking English but she didn’t know what language he was speaking. She wasn’t surprised that she understood him, though.
“You will avenge your wounds, your pain. You will share this with others. It is your blessing and your curse.”
“I don’t want it.”
“There is no choice.”
“There’s always choice.”
“You will return to that place, that peace, when true love returns to you.”
He took her face gently in his hands, kissing her chastely on the cheek. His gnarled hands closed over hers and he walked away. James looked into her fist. He had placed an amulet there, shaped vaguely like a heart, with a “W” embedded in its center.
Guy and Serena finally caught up with her.
“James, you really should have waited for…” Serena followed James’ gaze but didn’t see the stranger disappear around the corner. “You okay?”
James pounded on the elevator button again. “Get me the fuck out of here.”
posted by Midlife Virgin at 1:15 PM
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